Dear Dave,

My husband and I have been very blessed financially over the course of our lives. We make a little over $200,000 a year combined, and we currently have a net worth of around $4 million. But what do you do when you’re not motivated by that kind of thing anymore? How do you find and live out God’s purpose for your life, when you’ve already had a better life than you ever expected? 

Amanda 

Dear Amanda, 

I can’t tell you what your calling is, but I can say this. There’s a lot of fulfillment and joy to be found when you’re doing something that serves the people and things in your life that matter most. 

If you’ve studied psychology a bit, you may remember something called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Basically, it says once your physiological and safety needs have been met, you begin to feel the need to find other things to motivate you. It sounds like you’re both hard-working, performance-driven people. I am, too. And people like us get our relaxation, and even fulfillment, away from work in different ways than most people.  

If I were in your shoes, I’d start trying to think about ways you can serve other people or causes you care about. Maybe there were dreams you had a long time ago, and you put them aside for your career. What really speaks to you right now, at this stage of your life? For you, if you have kids in the house, it might mean becoming a stay-at-home mom and really pouring yourself into them. It might mean starting an animal shelter, or providing meals for people who are homebound. Everyone has dreams, and everyone’s dreams are different.

It sounds like you’ve been thinking about this for a while, so here’s my advice to you. Take a day, or even a weekend, all to yourself. Get away from everything and everyone—any and all outside distractions—and think about your future self. Bring along things to eat and drink, a bunch of notepads, pencils and a Bible. Then, before you do anything else, take a deep breath, relax and pray.

From that point on, be completely honest with God and with yourself. Open up your heart and mind to things you care about and all the possibilities. You have to have a goal that’s worthy in mind, and that’s the one thing that’s missing. But a time of thoughtful prayer—and yes, even daydreaming—may just put you closer to an answer than you’ve ever been before.

Congratulations on your success, Amanda. You and your husband truly have been blessed. But now, it may be the time to become a blessing to others!  

 —Dave 

 * Dave Ramsey is a best-selling author, personal finance expert and host of The Ramsey Show, heard by more than 20 million listeners each week. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS Mornings, Today Show, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business, and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for the company, Ramsey Solutions.

Dear Dave, 

I’m in college full-time right now, and my parents have been generous enough to pay for some of my school expenses. In addition, they let me live at home while I complete my degree. I work some nights and most weekends so I can go to school debt-free, but I’m trying to figure out how to move out on my own and continue working, while remaining a full-time student and attending career-related campus events. The cost of living is high in our area, so I’m having trouble figuring out how to make it all work. Do you have some advice? 

Will

Dear Will, 

You sound like a very driven and mature young man. Congratulations on everything you’ve been able to accomplish so far. I’m glad you’re working hard in school with an eye toward the future. First off, out of the three considerations you mentioned—school, work, and cost of living—I think you need to decide which is your number one priority. If I were in your shoes, school would come first.  

Now, to go to school without borrowing money, you’re going to have to keep working. But finishing school on time, while attending some of the extracurricular events that will move you toward your career, might pre-empt work. You’ll have to work enough to pay for things, but if you can finish school and hit your academic and graduation goals while staying at home just a little bit longer? That sounds like a winner to me. It’s a pretty nice deal your parents are offering, but I can understand your desire to be out on your own, too. 

I want you to be out on your own as soon as you can, as well. But if you do that right now, you’re going to have extra bills and be forced to work even more. That’s going to throw your entire school process out of whack. Guess what your number one priority was in that scenario? Right, moving out. If it’s the tail that’s wagging the dog, it has become the number one priority. If it’s disrupting work, and thereby disrupting your academics, then in my mind you’ve put your focus on the wrong thing. 

Your number one goal should be finishing school on time, while attending as many connected events as possible. Meanwhile, keep working enough so that you’re able to continue doing all this debt-free. If that means you’re staying at home a little bit longer to pull it off, I’d do it! 

—Dave

 * Dave Ramsey is an eight-time No. 1 national best-selling author, personal finance expert and host of The Ramsey Show, heard by more than 20 million listeners each week. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS Mornings, Today Show, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business, and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for the company, Ramsey Solutions.

Dear Dave,

My husband and I have our emergency fund account in the same bank as our checking and savings accounts. Do you think we should move the emergency fund to a different bank? A friend suggested doing this, but I wasn’t clear on why he thought this.

Shari

Dear Shari, 

Honestly, I wouldn’t worry about it too much if I were you. The only exception to that might be if you had loans you owed to that same bank.

Some commercial loan documents give banks the right to take money out of your accounts—without your permission—to pay the loan. This isn’t a common practice, and it usually doesn’t happen unless someone gets way behind on a loan. If you had a car loan with a particular bank, for instance, I wouldn’t keep a lot of money in that bank. 

But in your situation, Shari, I think everything’s fine.

—Dave 

 * Dave Ramsey is an eight-time No. 1 national best-selling author, personal finance expert and host of The Ramsey Show, heard by more than 20 million listeners each week. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS Mornings, Today Show, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business, and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for the company, Ramsey Solutions.

Dear Dave, 

My wife and I have three young daughters. Is there a Baby Step for weddings? We didn’t see one in your plan, but I was wondering if it was included in any of the other Baby Steps. 

Cedric 

Dear Cedric, 

This is a really good question. I’m glad you’re thinking about the future and planning accordingly.

I don’t have a specific Baby Step for weddings. If I did, it would probably come after Baby Step 5, which is setting aside a college—or trade school fund—for your kids. Maybe you could look at it as Baby Step 5b. Once you have retirement, education savings and extra house payments underway, you could start putting aside a little something for weddings. 

Don’t get me wrong, weddings are special. You absolutely should mark these kinds of milestones with a celebration. But a wedding is only a one-day event. And to be blunt, a good education is more important than a fancy wedding. This idea may not make me popular with some folks, but it’s the truth.

Maybe this is the dad in me coming out, but if I had to choose between paying for more education and paying for big weddings, I’m going to pay for school every time. Besides, there’s no correlation whatsoever between the size and/or cost of a wedding, and the happiness and success of the marriage.

Good luck, Cedric!

—Dave

 * Dave Ramsey is an eight-time No. 1 national best-selling author, personal finance expert and host of The Ramsey Show, heard by more than 20 million listeners each week. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS Mornings, Today Show, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business, and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for the company, Ramsey Solutions.

Dear Dave,

My husband and I are following your plan, and we’re on Baby Step 2. We just learned that the person who has done our taxes for the last three years made mistakes on all our returns. They were really nice and did our taxes for free, but now we owe back taxes in the amount of $18,000. Since we’re still paying off debt, the only savings we have is the $1,000 in our beginner emergency fund. Should we take out a personal loan to take care of this, or set up payments with the IRS?

Laura

Dear Laura,

Take out a personal loan. Period.

Let this sink in for a minute. How often does Dave Ramsey tell people to borrow money? Almost never. Why am I doing it now, in this situation? Because the IRS is the worst creditor on the planet. They have almost unlimited power, which they use and abuse, and they have ridiculously high penalties and interest rates. With a personal loan from a local bank or credit union, you’ll at least have more input and flexibility in deciding the terms of the agreement.

Now, I don’t know about you, but if the person doing my taxes screwed things up to the tune of $18,000, I’d find someone else in a heartbeat. I understand you want to work with someone nice, and free is usually a great price. But in this case, free was not so free after all.

Just go to your local bank or credit union, explain the situation and see what you can work out. I always recommend small banks or credit unions over any of the mega banks. Places like Bank of America and Fifth Third just have no soul or empathy whatsoever. And the customer service at a credit union or small bank is a hundred times better than what you’ll find at a big bank. Sure, they’re still bankers, but there’s a human element in there. You’re not just a number to them like you are to the mega banks.

I hate debt, Laura, and I’m sorry you guys are in this situation. But 100% of the time, I’d rather have personal loan debt than IRS debt. In my mind, it’s the lesser of two evils.

— Dave

 * Dave Ramsey is an eight-time national bestselling author, personal finance expert and host of “The Ramsey Show,” the second-largest talk radio show in America. He has appeared on “Good Morning America,” “CBS Mornings,” “Today,” Fox News, CNN, Fox Business and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for Ramsey Solutions.